February 20, 2009

'Why does my puppy eat dirt?'
An advice column by Jack

Your puppy eats dirt because you are a bad person. Your puppy can see into your heart and he knows that you went off your diet and ate all the Keebler Coconut Chocolate Chip cookies. Your puppy eats dirt because he knows that you got a chicken biscuit this morning at McDonald's and did not give him even a crumb. Your puppy eats dirt because you wouldn't let him eat the babies playing in the park this morning.

Mainly, your puppy eats dirt so you will have to go ALL THE WAY to the other end of the park to find the doggy water fountain and let him stay outside and play for a little while longer.

This ends today's 'Advice from Jack' column. Until next time...