December 30, 2013

Oh where shall I start? 

I think I'll start with the opening of my package from Spencer (from the doggy bloggy exchange):

Hmmm, this box is rather secure!!

Wow, look at all of this neat stuff!!

Maybe if I hurry, I can eat the green ball before the tall guy takes it away from me!

(Just kidding - it was squishy and I was trying to get the tall guy to take it away so he could throw it to me.)

Thank you so much for the cool presents Spencer!

I guess that's about it.

Have a great New Year's.

Wait, what?

You want to hear about the bullets?

Ok, but if I tell you, we must never speak of them again,

as I don't come off looking too well in the story.

It seems that the tall guy got a new set of 

speakers for his tv.

These speakers go in behind you so that when you watch the tv, it sounds like things are happening BEHIND YOU!

Well, he was watching a movie on the teevees

when all of a sudden,

BANG BANG!!!

 I'm lying on the floor and I hear two gunshots.

I jump up to see what's going on

and it turns out that it's just the sound

from the movie that the tall guy is watching

coming out of the speakers behind me.

He thought it was pretty funny.

Needless to say, we had a discussion afterwards.

Have a great New Years!

December 27, 2013

I've got so much to tell you.

But first,

here is a video of me

opening my first Christmas present

(with a little help). 

Can you guess what it is?

 

That's right, it's an antler. 

I liked it so much,

I took it outside right after we got all the paper off

(well except for the label which someone left on),

and forgot that I had MORE stuff to open

for like 12 hours!!

(Well it seemed like 12 hours.  It was probably more

like 5 minutes!)

The tall guy had to come remind me that

I still had a bunch of stuff to open.

I guess I'll have to write about the other presents

(including one from Spencer in the bloggy exchange)

next time.

After I tell you about the bullets!!

December 24, 2013

To each and every one of our friends...

We wish you the 

most happiest of holidays

and all the cookies you can eat.

 We'll be back in a few days to let you know

what was under the tree!!

December 20, 2013

That's ok.

I can wait.

(Later)

I snuck back in the hallway and look

what just happened to appear...

It's a Christmas miracular!!

I hope that big package is an official Red Ryder, 

carbine action, 

two-hundred shot range model air rifle! 

It's what I always wanted.

And I won't even shoot out my eye!

(MUCH LATER)

Well, guess what.

I just found out that NONE of the presents 

under the tree are for me.

Evidently, I've got a reputation

for tearing open packages

before I'm supposed to,

so the tall guy said that

the ones under the tree

weren't mine.

AND,

I'm not even getting an official Red Ryder,

carbine action, two-hundred shot range model

air rifle, regardless.

He said IF I was good between now

and Christmas,

he MIGHT be able to find a can of pinto beans in the pantry

that he could wrap up for me

and put them under the tree on December 24th.

It just gets pitiful-er and pitiful-er.

Your pinto bean friend,

Jack.

SIGH...

 

December 18, 2013

Finally...

We finally got the tree put up.  I made sure that it was sitting straight in the holder.  For some reason, the tall guy likes to put lights and all sorts of bobbily-bits on the tree.  He says it makes it look nice.  Personally (or should that be doggone-ally), I thought it looked just fine the way it was.  But evidently my opinion isn't worth much around here.

You may notice that I am not wearing my happy face.  You may also notice that there are no presents under the tree.  You may wonder if those two things are related.

I was told that Sanity Clause brings all the gifts to all the good boys next week and we would just have to wait and see IF, er... WHAT presents would be under the tree for me.

I would just sit here and wait but what you can't see in the picture is the fence that the tall guy put up to keep me out of the room with the tree when he is not here.  For some reason, he thinks I might decide to play with some of the bobbily-bits on the tree.

I think he knows me too well!

December 16, 2013

LOOK!!

That's right! 

You know what this means.

IT'S CHRISTMAS TREE TIME!!

FINALLY.

More to come...

December 10, 2013

I am sadness...

I still do not have no Christmas tree in the house yet.  The tall guy said we might get one on Sunday because he wanted to get a real tree and all the noodles would fall off if we put it in the house too early.

Therefore, I am sadness.

Maybe some extra cookies would help.

December 3, 2013

Yes please.

 

I told the tall guy that I would like

this tree for our new house.

He said it might be a skoshe too big.

We then got into a 'discussion'

about him making up words

like 'skoshe' that I had never heard of before.

I think he does it just to see if I'm paying attention.

This tree was at the place where we

go so he can get a banana and strawberry 

milkshake, except this time they didn't

have any banana ice cream so

he got banana pudding ice cream

which he said did not taste as good

as just the banana ice cream.

I think he's a skoshe bonkers:

SKBONKERSHE.

(If he can make up words,

I can too!)

 

 

December 1, 2013

Wake me up when the footballs are over...

or when it's time to eat.

It's all good.

November 25, 2013

I'm up. I'm up!!

Well, I thought I was.

It's too cold to get out of bed!

November 19, 2013

 

Can you see it?

Can you see how pitiful and sad I look?

I am the most pitifullest and sad-i-fied

puppy I know.

The tall guy won't let me play in the water.

He said last time I played in the stream,

I kept drinking the water

and got the dire rear.

I did not like having a dire rear,

so I guess I will listen to him.

This time.

So now all I can do is look at it.

A boy can dream can't he?

November 15, 2013

Now you want to hurry?

Really?

I'm not sure if you can tell,

but someone thinks it's cold outside.

Yes, that's the tall guy.

He's wearing a sweater,

his heavy coat,

his gloves,

and his funny hat with the ear flaps.

Meanwhile,

I am practically 'nekkit'

(as they say in these parts).

Of course, it took someone

25 minutes to get ready to go outside.

First he puts on his coat.

Then he puts on his gloves.

Then he puts on his hat.

Then he takes off his gloves

because he can't put on my string

when he's wearing his gloves.

Then he has to spend 10 minutes

trying to zip up his coat.

Then he puts on his gloves.

Then we head out the door.

But wait...

he can't lock the door

when he's wearing his gloves,

so he has to take off

ONE glove so he can get the keys

out of his pocket to lock the door.

THEN,

he puts back on the one glove

and we finally head out the door.

Then we go for a walk

and by the time he gets back home,

he's complaining because it's too hot.

So he has to take off his hat,

his gloves, his coat

AND his sweater.

And all this time, 

all I'm wearing is my collar.

I don't know if I'll ever figure it out!

 

November 11, 2013

A long walk with a bunch of leaves!

(and the tall guy too!)

The tall guy said he was tired of emptying boxes 

and putting stuff up,

so we went out and had a very nice walk in the woods.

 

We saw several other dogs and peoples

who had the same idea.

There were lots of neat smells

and things to see.

We even got to eat something

calls hash browns

before we went walking.

I thought they tasted just like potatoes.

They were very good.

The tall guy said it was supposed

to be 25 degrees tomorrow.

I think that's pretty cold,

although I'm not sure

how many degrees you need to be warm.

I'll let you know if I get froze.

 

 

November 6, 2013

Exploring my new neighborhood

Here we are out looking around

our new neighborhood.

It's pretty cool.

There are lots of new smells and things to see.

Here's one of them.  

Do you know what it is?

That's right.

It's a LEAVE.

But not just any old leave.

It's a honking HUGE leave.

I have never seen one this big before.

It is bigger than the tall guy's head,

and trust me,

he's got a big old noggin!

I'll keep you posted

as we find more new stuff.

October 30, 2013

My New Toy!!

Well, we FINALLY got to spend the night

in our new house.

It's so cool.

I've even got a new toy:

Do you know what that is?

That's right.

It's a doggy WINDOW.

We didn't have the right kind of door

to put in a doggy door

so I could go in and out as I wanted,

so the tall guy bought me

a doggy window.

It's pretty cool.

I was a bit wary at first,

but now it's just like the old dog door.

AND I have a whole big back yard to play in.

You can also see the boxes that

the tall guy brought to the new house.

We've got a LOT of boxes!

So, if you need any boxes,

come by in a few weeks

and you can have ALL you want.

October 25, 2013

Don't look at me, 

I didn't do it!

Well, we just got our new house,

and the tall guy has already broke it!

He had a guy come and tear out the shower

and look what he found:

I have no idea what it is,

but the tall guy was like 
"OH MY GOODNESS!"
(or something like that)
when he saw it.

Do YOU know what it is?

I'll have the tall guy tell you what it is
below:
.
.
.
.
TG:  It's the DRYER VENT that someone
put into the shower.
It was originally hidden behind the seat
in the shower, but when I had the fiberglass
shower taken out to tile the shower, there it was.
I guess they figured no one would ever find it.

October 22, 2013

I've got my own trees!!

Sorry we haven't been around too much.

We've been trying to get moved into our new house.

The tall guy said they are going to move our

furniture this week.

We've been going back and forth to 

our new house every day.

I was so excited to find out I have my own trees

in the back yard.

The tall guy said some of the trees

were over 80 feet tall!

I even have a back yard.

I've never had such a big back yard

in my whole life!

We'll be able to get online more

once we get settled in.

I don't know what settled in,

but, let me tell you,

the tall guy said he is way past

ready to get out of this apartment

and into our new house!

October 17, 2013

WATCH OUT!!

Well, now you tell me.

Evidently there might be bugs in the creek!

It seems that I wasn't supposed to be drinking

the water in the creek because of the bugs.

So I got a stomach ache,

and by stomach ache,

I mean

'the other end'.

The tall guy was not enjoying getting up

3 or 4 times a night to take me outside,

so I went to see the vet.

She gave me some stuff and I think 

I'm getting back to normal.

Unfortunately, it's raining today,

so I haven't gotten to go outside

but one time.

We'll let you know how it goes.

October 10, 2013

Today on Walking With Jack

The creek near our house

But I don't WANT to go home yet!!

The tall guy said he wanted

to buy me a GPS to put on my collar.  

I do not even know what 

no GPS is, but he said to ask any of you if you

use one and what kind you use.

He said he didn't want me to get lost

and not be able to find me.

I'm hoping it comes in peanut butter flavor!!

October 5, 2013

My New Pictures

Here is a picture of me out 

running in the grass:

Wait.

Here is a picture of me playing in the nice,

cool water:

No, wait.

Here is a picture of me

frollicking in the meadow:

AND I can cook bread too!

What?

You mean those AREN'T pictures

of me doing all that stuff?

You mean the tall guy has been looking

for appliances instead of taking care of me

24 hours a day?

I think I am outraged.

Well, maybe not outraged,

but I am something.

Just to remind you,

here is what I looked like

relaxing in the grass

before someone decided that

our new house needed a stove

and refrigerator:

Who knows?

He's talking about lighting fixtures now.

It may be years before I get to 

go back outside and play!

September 30, 2013

Oh my my!!!

Look where we went!

Isn't this some of the most beautifulest water

you have EVER seen?

It is so pretty I just couldn't stand it!

Of course, you may notice that I did NOT

get to go into the water,

but it was still fun!

We even saw a really cool boat.

The tall guy said that it was a replica of

one of Columbus' boats.

I think he said it was the Pinto Bean.

I hope we get to go back there

really soon!!

September 24, 2013

Ahhhhh...

I think the world looks better from this angle.

This is my new favorite position.  It's how I look when I'm not ready to go back into the house yet.  The tall guy has to come and pretend like he's going to step on my tail to get me up.

He refuses to drag me back into the house like a sack of potatoes.  

Speaking of the tall guy, he says to let everyone know that he is still visiting your blogs (yes, each and every one of them).  He's usually reading them in bed before he goes to sleep so he will have happy dreams.  He just wanted you to know.  Hopefully, we'll be in our new house soon, so he can get back to his regular schedule.

September 20, 2013

So...

while I'm off playing in the water,

the tall guy goes sneaking off to have a good time!

Here is where he stayed:

It was SO big, they even

had two houses INSIDE of the place:

He saw some man who got buried in the sand.

(The tall guy said he was ok, but I'm not so sure!)

He got to look at the boats and the water.

He might not let me get in there

because I might just try to swim to the other side.

He even saw purple Sprite!

He said they didn't have any purple Pepsi,

or he would have gotten that instead.

He said he can tell how good a 

restaurant is if they serve Pepsi

instead of Coke.

All the finest restaurants serve Pepsi!

He eventually decided he missed me,

so he came back home.

It's about time!

September 15, 2013

It has come to my attention...

that some people are putting up statues of children playing and not including a dog as part of the statue.

Well, needless to say, I was smacked in the gob when I heard this.

I will gladly come to your house and be a part of your statuary if you have something good to eat.

You may see a sample of my statue-ness above.

Actually, on second thought, it might look as if I have chased all those children up a tree.  

Perhaps we should discuss this with the sculptor.

I'll get back with you!

September 12, 2013

Please may I go play in the water?

Thank you very much!!

September 9, 2013

Hello?

You meet the most interesting characters when you are out on a walk.  I watched this guy for about 6 hours and he never barked.  He didn't look at me.

He never even moved!  He must have had 

some really good training!

(The tall guy did not buy any of the houses in this neighborhood

with the dogs who do not move.

He said something about them costing over 1/2 of one million dollars.

But we like to walk around there anyway and pretend!)

September 4, 2013

I think I'm gonna like it here!

This is called 'grass'.

Evidently, all my puppy eyes

finally got to the tall guy

and he said that we could stay here.

So we have been busy for the past week

trying to find a new place to live.

The tall guy promised me that it would have

1)  grass

2)  trees

and

(he said this was the MOST important thing)

3) my very own door that I can go 

in and out when I need to at 3AM.

He doesn't seem to like getting up

and taking me outside that early in the morning,

but when you gotta go,

you gotta go.

So that is why we haven't been around much lately,

just in case you were wondering,

but I know he reads your blogs in bed every night

before he goes to sleep.

He said he spent all day yesterday

dealing with something called

'more gauges'.

I asked him how many gauges he needed,

and that if we could stay here,

I would buy him some.

I'll let you know what happens!