Thursday, December 3, 2009

December 3, 2009

How to play
Frisbee Golf
(A Labrajack Field Guide©)

Hundreds of peoples have written in and asked me
'Jack, how do puppies play Frisbee Golf?
What is Frisbee Golf?
Can you teach ME how to play Frisbee Golf?

Well, actually no one has asked me any of those questions,
but since I needed to write about something, here we go!

You need 3 things to play Frisbee Golf:
• A bunch of puppies/dogs
• A field
• A red Frisbee

OR a BLUE Frisbee will be fine.
Once one of the puppies picks up the Frisbee,
then all the other dogs try to take the Frisbee AWAY from the puppy
who has the Frisbee.

Two things are important:
First) Do not be a mean puppy when you try to take away the Frisbee.
Nobody likes a mean puppy.
You should ask nicely if you can play with the Frisbee too.
If the puppy will not let you play with the Frisbee, then you should
er., uh.... gently tug the Frisbee until he drops it!
Second) You should let the puppy who knows HOW to pick up
the Frisbee be the one who picks it up.
There is nothing more embarrassing than watching
a puppy try for like 6 hours to pick up a Frisbee off of the ground.
Or a dime.
(That's why puppies never have any change.
They can't pick it up off the ground if they drop it!
Cats, on the other hand, are loaded.
If you need a candy bar from the machine,
go hit up the cat for 3 quarters!
But I digress...)

Figure 1) Puppy who can't pick up the Frisbee.
Note the disgusted look on the face
of the very handsome puppy standing next to him!

Once you have the Frisbee, do NOT,
and this is VERY IMPORTANT,
DO NOT EAT the Frisbee
or chew it up.
If you do, you will not have no more Frisbee.
And if you have no more Frisbee,
it is almost impossible to play Frisbee Golf!

Figure 2) Wrong! No! Bad Puppy!
(I know - it sounds silly, doesn't it?
But that's how peoples think they should talk to their puppies!
A simple 'I don't think you should do that!' would suffice!)

Then, once you get the Frisbee picked up,
you must
(Or the big mastiff who likes to sit on you - either visual is ok!)

Because remember, all the other EVIL puppies
are trying to take YOUR Frisbee that you
got at the pet store because the tall guy was too cheap
to buy you the fuzzy squirrel that you REALLY wanted!
I mean, come on!
Would it really kill him to spend $29.95
every now and again?

Eventually, you will get tired
and then you have finished playing
Frisbee Golf!

There! Wasn't that easy?
So, next time your peoples have company,
why don't you invite them to enjoy a nice game
of Frisbee Golf with you?

Or Monopoly!


  1. Jack, That is the best ever rules of frisbee golf we have every seen! What about the guys who bend the Frisbee in half when they pick it up so it looks like they have giant lips or a huge taco in their mouth? Would that disqualify Kona?:)

    PS, $29.95 for s stuffed squirrel...dude you gotta come to LA they are only $6 here:)


    Was Mango RH there?

    PeeEssWoo: My Auntie Di lives in Phoenix so I know some of the weather fun woo AZ types have!

  3. Jack,
    Those are some pretty snazzi rules. Thanks for xplaining them. I might like to play this frisbee golf. I can run like the wind, and I can grab ahold really well. As a matter of fact, I think we have a Blue frisbee around here, Can you play this with kids too or just dogs? Cuz I have 2 munchkins here and I can get the frisbee from them easy~~Like taking candy from a baby!!!!


  4. Those rules are very clear - thanks for explaining them.

    We are always trying to help the human understand our game of tag/wrestle/race/your it/couch olympics/crash and trample the human/zoomies, but he says it is too confusing to understand. But we sure love it.

  5. Dear Mr. Sgt. at Arms of frisbee those are some excellent rules and demonstrations. My favorite is the part about running like the Hounds of Hell are after you or a big mastiff!!! That was a good visual.
    I have a question Jack...has a kitty ever infiltrated the puppy park?
    Thanks for making us smile today.
    Madi and Mom

  6. Well Jack that sounds like a lot of work. Especially if the Relentlessly Huge sits on you after.

    We'll take a pass and just eat the frisbee.

    Bobo and Meja

  7. None of us can pick up a frisbee...besides, after the Tiger incident Mom wouldn't let us play golf anyway!!!
    Par, Birdie, Par, Par!!!

  8. You're very thorough in your explanations (I guess you have to be for the stupid dogs who are reading your blog... but then, if they're actually reading your blog, how stupid can they be?) Well, anyway, I find your instructions to be concise and easy to understand. Thank you. I'm not convinced I want to play frisbee golf, but at least now I have the rules down. BTW, I didn't know that cats were loaded... that's good to know.
    I found a dollar bill on my walk yesterday. It was just laying there in the middle of a big field not far from my house. Weird.

  9. Ahhh Jack - always the great teacher! THanks for the tips. Now I just got to get Mom to buy me the frisbee...

  10. inside voice WAS asking you how to play frisbee golf...Thanks Jack!!!


  11. So it's a frisbee, I thought it was a big cookie. I will have to try to play that. I think it would be fun to play frisbee football, then I could tackle them!

  12. Ok! Will try frisbee golf! Thanks for the run down on that game Jack. Hope the Tall Guy will indeed get you that fuzzy squirrel one of these days!

    Hugs and snaggle-tooth kisses,
    Sierra Rose

  13. Hey Jack!!! You've got me hooked, frisbee golf, who would have thought!!! Love the pics!!!

    lotsa licks,

  14. Jack and TG....check back in with us....we have 'revised' our had a very good point...and we beg your forgiveness :-)!!!
    Madi and Mom

  15. Hounds of Hell...ooh I have seen day I wil share my scary tale.

    Good guide, I will keep it in mind my next Frisbee Golf tournament at the park.

    Paws Out!

    Olive :)

  16. Great instructions Jack! Soo funny! Darwin prances once she gets a frisbee from another dog... though she's one of those that don't know how to pick it up if it falls flat on the ground.

  17. Jack, dude... dis is a little embarrassing, but I tried to pick a frisbee up once and couldn't do it, BOL! And when someone throws a frisbee to me, I step aside and watch it hit the ground. Then I let them pick it up. I don't know why they get tired of dis game so easily...


  18. Thanks for the rules, but SOME DOGS WHO SHALL REMAIN NAMELESS think frisbees are soley for eating. They won't even chase them. The humans stand there and throw the frisbees in very impressive ways, and said dogs look at them and go,"Woo. Exciting." And then sniff the grass and eat a bit of dirt.